bigdmia

If Tiger Woods was entered in a dictionary

bigdmia — Thu, 10 Dec 2009 17:49:42 +0000

Tiger Woods [tahy-ger . woodz]

v.tr.

To have relationships with women far less hot that one’s wife, and subsequently ruin one’s reputation.
To have have multiple inexplicable relations with women (around 20 or more) at the same time.
To have extramarital relationships that are accompanied by a scandal similar to a car crash.

example: I used to look up to him as someone who had it all and still managed to live a decent, honest life, but then he went and pulled a Tiger Woods and now I can never look at him the same way again.

The most vicious fire-hydrant killer in the urban jungle.
A golf club punching bag that explodes onto fire-hydrants
A defective self-guided ballistic missile installed in SUV that ram into fire-hydrants and trees.

example: We have to protect all those poor firehydrants from the likes of Escapading Tiger Woods.

Malawian available for adoption. Dear Ma …

bigdmia — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 15:18:38 +0000

Malawian available for adoption. Dear Madonna I am well aware of your soft spot for Malawians. I am glad to inform you there is a Malawian available for adoption. He is a 40 year old Malawian male in need of a home. There are advantages for adopting me; no potty training required. Guaranteed temper-tantrum-free, so long as you feed me, dress me and of course; pocket money.

WANTED: Somebody to go forward in time w …

bigdmia — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 15:08:43 +0000

WANTED: Somebody to go forward in time with me, to save our world. This is not a fake ad. My contact: destroy-terminators@skynet.com. You’ll be paid after we get back. Must bring your own weapons of choice to destroy shape-shifters and cyborgs with a weird Austrian accent. Safety not guaranteed.

Give a man a fish, you feed him for a da …

bigdmia — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 15:05:12 +0000

Give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you introduce another competitor into the overcrowded fishing industry, he and his descendants will do so until all fish approach extinction, contravening EU fishing policy, reducing the biodiversity of the world’s oceans and increasing the economic decline of the fishing industry. Therefore give a man a fish, and you save the world from overfishing.

A great concern for our world that it ma …

bigdmia — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 20:17:07 +0000

A great concern for our world that it may become unsustainable and surprised at the drastic change of the global climate. And the greatest concern and surprise is coming from the same source who claim that life on earth came into being as a result of a cosmic accident?

As of today 27 August 2009; 66 people ha …

bigdmia — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 20:13:12 +0000

As of 27 August 2009; 66 people died of swine flu in the UK and the Government is on standby for a mass immunization program in Britain to fight this TERRIBLE pandemic that has claimed 66 people. I wonder what preventive measures the Government will take with the other pandemics; 110,000 people died last year alone due to Alcohol (10,000) and Smoking (100,000) related deaths?

The Chichewa and Chinyanja language spoken in the sci-fi blockbuster ‘District 9′

bigdmia — Sun, 06 Sep 2009 10:07:50 +0000

The South African filmed District 9, has to be one of the best extra terrestrial movie I have watched in a long time. The story-line and acting (rare in alien movies) are rock solid, and the action including CGI which was very impressive is a bonus to the movie.

However, I noted the Character Obesandjo played by Eugene Khumbanyiwa (Malawian) portraying the Nigerian gang leader in District 9 did not speak in any of the common Nigerian languages such as Hausa, Yoruba, Igbo and Ibibio or even in any of the common languages spoken in Johannesburg such as IsiXhosa, IsiZulu, IsiNdebele, Sesotho and Setswana, but rather spoke in fluent Chichewa (also known as Chinyanja). Chichewa or Chinyanja is a bantu language neither spoken in Nigeria nor South Africa. It is the National language of Malawi and widely spoken in Zambia, Mozambique and parts of Zimbabwe.

You would have to understand African languages to notice this anomaly.

If you are a fan of the Sci-fi genre, this is not a movie to miss. I give it a 10/10.

Life like an only garment

bigdmia — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 12:01:01 +0000

How you choose to live your life can be compared to the only garment you have to wear, you either wear it with dignified vivacity and leave such an impression in this life that people can not forget the fond memories of you… or you go drably to the grave and not to be remembered at all.

To regret over what you don’t have and what you could do, is to waste what you do have and what you can do.

bigdmia — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 11:56:25 +0000

A mother-of-two has had bleach thrown over by teens

bigdmia — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 16:17:18 +0000

A mother-of-two has had bleach thrown over her after asking a group of teens to be quiet in a Vue cinema in Leeds… I think it is high time now for the Government to apply the Terrorism Act on teens who are old enough to scheme diabolic acts. Send terrorist teens to Guantanamo Bay for causing terror in public.